Would men ever date below their league à la Selena Gomez and Ariana Grande?
Please, change my mind on this
Last week, a picture popped up on my Instagram feed that really did stop me in my tracks a little bit.
It was a photo of Selena Gomez, sitting courtside at a basketball match with her new boyfriend, Benny Blanco.
I’m just going to have to out myself as a terrible person here, because I immediately screenshot it, knowing I needed to discuss what I was seeing with a friend.
By chance, that friend happened to be Lucy P, as she was the first person to Facetime me that day. When I showed her the picture, her reaction was underwhelming to say the least.
As I waited for her to comment on the contrasting images, her response was a simple, “I bet he’s funny”.
It was this view, that made me take a step back from my nastiness and fall down a Benny Blanco hole, which, of course, made me see him in a completely different light.
First of all, he’s an incredibly successful music producer and songwriter, second of all there’s a video from this same date where you can seem him mouthing to Selena, “You’re beautiful”. Third of all, when I repeated this conversation with my nail artist, Izzy Taylor, she introduced me to Benny Blanco’s feet pics.
Now, before you go there, it’s not what you’re thinking. You see, it turns out that LP was right when she said he must be funny, because this guy has a whole different level of appreciation for nail art.
Yes, that is a pepperoni pizza painted on his toes.
For more, because I’m sure you want more, please visit the creator of these incredible pedicures: @NailedByTav .
This then led to me going through his socials and honestly, this guy is an absolute hoot. Benny, I’m sorry for being so shallow. I totally get it now and if things don’t work out with Selena, call me.
However, while I know that ‘ugly’ is a social construct and I do really want to avoid using the term. I just don’t believe that the vast majority of hetrosexual men, would date a woman considered by society to be less attractive than them.
If the shoe was on the other foot, I don’t think most men would even give their version of a Benny the time of day. Yes, I made an initial dismissive judgement, but as soon as I saw a slither of personality, I retracted it.
Then I present to you Ariana Grande, who is now allegedly dating her Wicked co-star Ethan Slater (pictured on the right).
These are two incredibly, conventionally attractive women, dating two men who don’t fit those same parameters and I can’t think of a single famous man in the same position.
I also think it extends to real life and again, I feel like I’m treading on egg shells here, but I can think of many IRL couples where the man is clearly “punching”, but I can’t think of any women “punching”.
I’m sorry men, I just think women care more about personalities than you do.
Honestly, this is why, when I’m swiping through the apps, I skip past all the conventionally attractive men, because I know I’m way out of their league.
Just to note, I’m aware of the irony of me calling these men “ugly” and then claiming women aren’t shallow, but I know for me, I rarely fancy a guy on looks alone. It’s always once I get to know them, whereas I don’t think men would give a woman the same chance.
What do you think? Am I completely wrong here? Am I in-fact the problem?
In my experience, women really want their friends to like their partner, men want their friends to think their partner is attractive.
I follow Alicia McCarvell on insta - that is maybe my only example of where she is ‘punching’ and honestly the sh*t she gets for it too! Unreal. Even a Google search will show suggestions like is she really married to Scott! Gah!