The very public urinal in Vauxhall

The woman (who is me) was (and remains) too stunned to speak

If you saw me yesterday, I apologise for bringing this up again, but, yes, I am still raging about the incredibly public urinals outside of Vauxhall station.

Admittedly, it had been a stressful morning. All my trains were cancelled due to some emergency with the line and stifling my departing cough, amongst my fellow commuters, left me a clammy mess.

So, yes, I did emerge from Vauxhall station not in the best mood, but even if I had walked out of there with a spring in my step, it would still have been stunted by the man having a wee in front of me.

Yes, right outside the station, there is a what’s described as a ‘very public urinal’. So public in fact, that you can see the urine smears as you cross the road into Pret for your morning croissant.

I don’t know if I’ve lost my mind or the world has, but if there was a symbol to represent that men still rule the planet, this urinal surely has to be it.

We’ll get into my gender rage in a bit, but politics aside and call me a prude if you will, but it’s just disgusting to look at.

Our bathroom habits aren’t like restaurants, it’s not fun to see the chefs at work.

Second of all and I don’t want this to sound ridiculous, but as a woman, there is something uncomfortable about knowing there is a man in the nearby vicinity, with his willy out.

I’m not implying that the men who use this urinal are flashing, by any means, but there is a level of discomfort it brings because by making it so public, you are forced into becoming somewhat of a voyeur.

I honestly was just so astounded by this discovery that I had to Google it. To see if it was a long running inside joke or something.

Turns out, it isn’t and all I could find was various local London news articles quoting how it saves them paying to go in the station or that it’s better than men “weeing on the wall”.

Sorry, but why can women control their bladders and not men? Women who give birth and ruin their pelvic floors aren’t expected to just start urinating in public.

What must it be like, to be a man and not have to do that doorstep jig every time you’re looking for your keys. No widdling on the bathroom floor for you, gents. You pee wherever the wind takes you.

Again, it might be the end of my cough, it might be because I’m rewatching Mad Men and the misogyny is infuriating, but this public urinal just sums up the disparage in how women are still treated in society.

I’m just gonna list it all and then go to bed because I’m hitting my keys so hard, I’m going to chip a nail.

There isn’t an alternative for women or for anyone with a disability, come to think of it. So while the men can piss where ever they like, the rest of us have to either find a toilet or pay to use one in the station, which will inevitably have a longer queue because remember that Substack I wrote.

Spoiler alert: Architecture = male dominated field. Public toilets designed by men who disregard female anatomy. Male and female given same toilet space when women take longer because of their body and because of periods and because they are more likely to have a child with them. This = Long toilet queues for women.

Not only is this public urinal prioritising the needs of able bodied men over everyone else, it’s also disregarding how it makes the rest of us feel.

You’re uncomfortable at the man weeing over there? Well sorry hunny, but he really has to go, so avert your eyes.

What was that? You really need to urgently get to a toilet because your womb lining is gushing out of you? Sorry love, there’s a Starbucks over there, they might have a toilet. That doesn’t sound as important as the big wee I need.

God, I hate it here sometimes.