Being part of the Taylor fandom is exhausting
Between the cinema experience and the hot takes, this showgirl has checked out
One thing you should know about me is, I’m someone who likes to be involved in pop culture communities.
Whether that’s checking the Jellycat subreddit, watching James Welsh unbox his latest Pop Mart purchase, preordering a Switch 2 (despite the distinct lack of new games) and planning a nail set around films of the moment like Saltburn.
So, as someone that loves a bit of Taylor Swift and who was still riding a post Eras tour high, I vowed to go all in on Friday 3rd October - aka her new album release day. Starting with pre-ordering one of her limited edition vinyls for the record player I do not own.
But, when the actual day came around. I felt sheer overwhelm. My temporary flatmate Lucy P, had made a schedule for us, which started with a 6am wakeup to start watching Taylor’s many radio interviews.
Needless to say, I missed that by two hours, but still, did watch all of her appearances on Radio 1, Heart, Magic and Capital.
Afterwards, it was the start of the album listens and I was already feeling like a fake fan for not being able to list my favourite track or know all the lyrics and lore.
A good three listens later (whilst stickering for our charity beauty sale), it was time to pause while I accompanied Lucy P on a flat viewing. Except, we didn’t entirely stop. As we played the album all the way there and back.
Just as I was starting to nail down my favourites, the reviews and opinions started coming in through my phone and interestingly enough, my TikTok doesn’t know me as well as I thought, because while I was still humming away to Opalite, my feed was serving me nothing but hot takes.
This is the part of fandoms I hate, where you go between comparing yourself to the diehards and not feeling invested enough, but invested enough to feel shamed when the criticisms come rolling in.
That’s always the way with a hot take directed at something you like or that you’re invested in. It feels personal.
Suddenly, you’re questioning everything from your taste in music, to your moral compass.
Am I less of a feminist because I actually quite like singing along to Wood or even worse, for thinking the Charli XCX reference really isn’t that deep?
By this point, the fatigue of being so heavily invested in a launch day, was already setting in. Unfortunately for me, Lucy P had booked us two tickets to the Life of a Showgirl listening party at the cinema for 8pm. Which turned out to be 12 lyric videos, accompanied by two playings of the same The Fate of Ophelia music video.
Don’t even get me started…
Just when I thought that was more than enough Taylor for one day, there was one more event to cross off on our schedule - Taylor’s appearance on The Graham Norton Show.
Will I ever attempt to be this invested in an album release again? Hell no. To me, the experience felt so much less authentic than if I’d just played the album at various times over the weekend.
Not only that, but being served every anti-Taylor opinion, made me feel so singled out. “No one cared when Beyonce performed in Dubai,” I ranted to my friend.
However, after my Saturday night viewing of Strictly Come Dancing, I got an important reminder of why we shouldn’t take those hot takes so personally.
While watching my fave reality TV show, I like to share my very brief opinions on each couple’s dance. All with the caveat that I can’t even walk down the Strictly stairs, let alone dance on the floor.
Today I checked my requests folder and noticed a message right at the top from someone who wrote “#BeKind”.
In response to one dance I had posted “V good. Shocked that’s week 2. Problem is, I have zero investment in him”. To which, this person who had never messaged me before, wrote, “???” followed by, “#BeKind. These people are real humans and more importantly my mates. Big love.”
There was one more “BeKind” in response to me criticising a drag performer on the show for taking the piss out of Tess’ outfit for the second week in a row. Which felt ironic when we’re both clearly vouching for a kinder approach.
At first I stewed on it, then panicked about being a terrible person, before finally realising it was the same as my Taylor situation.
These people are what this person cares about. My comments might be throwaway, but not if that person is your dear friend.
However, that investment, whether it’s someone you know or someone you admire, should never make us lose sight of how deep something actually is.
After all, it only takes a puddle of water to drown.
I am all in on Taylor , what I’ve drawn from the “hate” - if you can even call the opinions of people with zero joy in their hearts hate ,is that if you love something you love it , and if you don’t you don’t , please don’t ever stop sharing what brings you happiness and worse censor yourself over why it doesn’t ! It’s wild to me that there was an expectation from people that this album was going to change their lives , or heal them in some way…. If they think that , it’s therapy they need not 12 songs xx
As someone who was never really much of a Taylor Swift fan (has never really gotten into her music) I listened to Life of a Showgirl and actually surprisingly really liked it! Wood & album-titled with Sabrina are definitely my favorites. Would I listen again? Probably not, but that’s just because Taylor isn’t really my cup of tea. People who wanna make this album seem like a “deeper issue” than it really is are people who are chronically online and just wanna justify their dislike of someone’s music or personality as something “virtuous” or “good” because they’re terrified of being deemed a hater. No, the Charli XCX shot was not that deep, Charli had been throwing shots at Taylor for a while. Her fans are just angry that the woman who calls herself “brat” & sings about doing cocaine is being treated like… well.. a brat. It’s the toxic mindset that women in music MUST sing kumbaya and love each other 24/7 or they’re “not feminist”! It’s nothing but chronically online rhetoric. Like what you like, nobody’s gonna stop you and Taylor’s album truly is a non-issue! She’s not a n@zi, problematic person or KKK member, she’s literally just making an album people are getting paid to shit on. At the end of the day, all that matters is that actual people like it - which they clearly do, since they streamed the album enough to break records- and her fans, who she made it for, like it. Taylor’s pockets are not getting hurt by TaylorHater2783 on TikTok saying her album is trash. She sees the positivity and appreciates it, I’m sure.